I’m slowly healing from the incident with the pastor. My mind wants to get back to its fluid and effortless ability think abstractly and design complex things. I can feel the thoughts, the creativity, the desire in my mind just waiting to get out. I can start thinking like I used to but when it gets to the details things start to fall apart, my mind still shuts it self off even though it knows the answer. Little by little I’m getting better but right now I’m in a very sensitive mental state. I was starting to think like normal but then made a wrong turn whole driving and that was enough to stop my train of though and have my mind drawing blanks again.
Literally just spelling a word wrong as I type this can block my mind. I need extreme peace free of frustrations for a while while I get my mind back to normal. The ability is still there, I can feel it.