So, it’s the new year and the new decade and already we’re off to an “interesting” start to say the least. Nonetheless, 2019 just ended and like in the vain of other music critics on Youtube, I decided to make my own list for the Top 10 worst songs of 2019 (Yes I know i’m late, but real life is a bitch). What are my thoughts on the year overall? Ignoring the quality for a second, this was a really weird year for popular music and I compare it to 2013 as to how weird and bizarre the hits were and the trends and comebacks were. Unlike that year though, this one left a lot to be desired. It was much better than 2018 let me say that but even then that doesn’t raise the bar a lot. The one good thing that I can say is that we had new artists and new sounds coming in that could probably dominate the first half of the new decade and the hitmakers from the first and middle half of the decade were yesterday’s news or couldn’t keep up with these new sounds. Regardless, this is a year that i’ll look back on with not that much good memories, but not with bad ones either. So with all that it’s time for my list where I listened to all 100 songs that made the Billboard Year End and found the ones that I thought were garbage. Let me just say first off that this isn’t an objective list nor am I saying that all of this is fact. If you do like these songs, including my number one pick then that’s fine, it’s your taste and it’s what you like. Nothing wrong with that cause this is just my subjective opinion and you are free to disagree with me. And yes, I will be making a ten best songs of 2019 soon so be on the lookout for that if you’re interested for what I thought was the good. With all that out of the way, let’s start:
10.
I Don’t Care by Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber. Pop music by the latter half of the decade got less and less popular as rap music and even country began to take over and this song shows you why that’s the case. The song is about being in a party that you don’t care for but yet as long as you’re with the one you love, then it’s fine. This wouldn’t be too bad if the lyrics weren’t shallow, lazy and were sung by two people who gave a shit. Both Ed and Justin sound like they aren’t giving it their all and are phoning it in. There’s no energy, passion or emotion into it, they practically sound interchangeable from one another. The production isn’t that good either, it’s this watered down island sound that’s processed as all get out and makes the song a chore to sit through and barely changes at all, it’s the same chord progression throughout except for the bridge which us just clapping. It comes from this bizarre project album that Ed made where he collaborated with different artists for no reason and this is the worst from it. This went up to number two on the Billboard Hot 100 only blocked by Old Town Road and thank god that it didn’t hit the top spot. If both of them didn’t care for the song, then why should I?
9.
Robbery by Juice WRLD. In 2018, one of the biggest emerging artists of that year was Juice WRLD, a teenager from Chicago who made standard heartbreak songs and about being successful. Unfortunately, that success was short-lived when he died of a seizure in December. He will be missed by his family and the rap community, but his last hit before he died sadly wasn’t good. It’s a standard breakup song just like his biggest hit “Lucid Dreams” but instead of reminiscing, this one is about dealing with the heartbreak. The lyrics are pretty passable when it comes to a song written by a young adult, but it also highlights how amateur it is. The beat is really sappy with its piano and standard trap production which makes the song melodramatic. What puts it on the list though is the singing, where he whines into the microphone in order to sound more emotional and genuine and it just doesn’t work. One pet peeve that I have for music is singers who yelp and whine in order to sound “emotional” and to me, it makes the experience really unbearable. Jarad here just sounds like a tryhard to me and it’s embarrassing. Luckily, this isn’t his last hit cause he got another Top 10 hit after his death which is better and if I wanted to listen to a song from him about heartbreak, i’d stick with his biggest hit. He will be missed and he didn’t deserve to die so young, but he didn’t deserve to have a song as bad as this make it to the Top 40. Life just sucks like that…
8.
Mo Bamba by Sheck Wes. Ever since around 2016 or so, rap has been considered the biggest genre in America, and trap was the biggest of them all. This in turn led to a bunch of rappers who became household names, had moderate success, one hit wonders or achieved little to no success. One song that became popular and a meme was this one. First let’s start that this song relies on a really stupid gimmick where Sheck stretches his syllables on the chorus and the verses in order to be different(?) and it’s just grating. It’s funny that one of the lines in the song is him boasting that he has so many flows when he really doesn’t except for the breakdown after the middle which i’ll admit elevates the song a little bit. About the lyrics, it’s about him being a baller and comparing himself to basketball player Mohamed Bamba (which is where the title of the song comes from), which is just ambitious at best and cliche at worst. The beat is this piano riff mixed with trap which is obnoxious and also repeats throughout, making it sound like an ice cream truck. Now what’s the meme about? It’s where this song got compared to “Sicko Mode” by Travis Scott, which I don’t get why since that song is miles better than this dreck. This just isn’t a fun song to bump to and it isn’t higher on the list because I can see it as so bad it’s good and that’s it. I hope that Sheck Wes (which is a stupid rap stage name btw) stays a one hit wonder.
7.
Baby by Lil Baby & DaBaby. Other than trap, another form of rap that got popular was mumble rap which is self explanatory. Not all of it is terrible, but it’s a subgenre where you don’t come in expecting Tupac or Run-DMC type quality. Either way, this song is awful. It’s about being a hustler and the fact that both rappers have “Baby” as their stage name. Basically, it’s another song that relies on a gimmick, instead a lot more dumb. The lyrics aren’t anything to write about, and the beat is this faint synth string and occasional twinkle trap beat that sounds weak. The rapping however is horseshit, where Lil Baby mumbles and mumbles with no semblance of a melody or flow and is incomprehensible. It’s his whole schtick yes and he has used it to his advantage with the song “Drip Too Hard” but in here he sounds like a parody of himself. He literally sounds like a baby babbling, which is likely the intention. The other rapper, newcomer DaBaby who exploded in popularity last year, is barely passable and uses a 2013-2014 era flow that doesn’t make the song any better. There’s not much else to say other than this song is hot garbage, and the ironic part is that the song is owned by Quality Control Records, who really really should’ve enforced it for this track.
6.
Cash Shit by Megan Thee Stallion feat. DaBaby &
My Type by Saweetie. A two way tie for this one. After Cardi B became popular in 2017 and replaced Nicki Minaj as the top female rapper, she opened the door for other female rappers, unfortunately some of them trying to ride off her success. Let’s start with Megan Thee Stallion, who is a blatant copycat of Cardi that it borders on plagiarism. But despite that, she does have her own original style with songs like “Big Ole Freak” that I like and “Hot Girl Summer” which is a great summer jam. This song however is what happens when you ride the coattails a bit too far. It’s about being a bad bitch and having sex with a man for money, which is normal for female rappers like this. DaBaby part’s is the male point of view where he enjoys the sex, and he’s honestly a pointless addition to the song other than make the song get to the Top 40. Her rapping is pretty mediocre, but she struggles to stay on beat because of her awful flow in the chorus. Speaking of the beat, it’s literally the sound of water splashing and a bass boom, which makes me think that they recorded it in their bathroom. It’s a disgusting beat and it makes me uncomfortable listening to it. “Big Ole Freak” should’ve been her first Top 40 hit, not this.
The other song that got tied for this number is “My Type” by Saweetie. Unlike Megan, Saweetie (Belle) has been in the underground for a while before making it big with this song. The first thing you’ll notice is the familiar beat, which is a sample of the 2004 crunk hit “Freek-A-Leek” by Petey Pablo. Unfortunately, they didn’t do anything with this sample and just chopped it and looped it, not making it any different than the original song. On top of this beat which sounds more like they stole it without credit, you have the same by the numbers lyrics about being a bad bitch by a woman who sounds like she’s trying too hard to rap and singing a karaoke version of the original badly. At least the chorus is catchy but that’s about it. With all that, it’s a good example of the term “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” when it really isn’t.
5.
You Need To Calm Down by Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift was one of the biggest pop stars of the entire decade, scoring hit after hit and a bunch of number one albums. This one from her most recent album is where she attempts to be “progressive”, and missing the mark by a county mile. The production is not too bad really, standard pop production with bass, drum machines and finger snaps. The singing is really condescending to the listener and sounding really defensive trying to convey the message. Speaking of the message, it is completely misguided and cynical. The first part is about her addressing her haters and critics, which she has done before in previous songs. But then, the second half of the song is about praising the LGBT community and deflecting all the criticism thrown at it. It’s a sudden swerve to the topic of the song that it’s jarring and out of nowhere. Let me say this though, i’m not opposed to big pop stars showing support for the LGBT community in their songs and videos as long as they know what they’re doing and show tact about it. Taylor unfortunately doesn’t and she sounds like an amateur diving into the topic for the first time misunderstanding it and combined with the singing, sounding cynical and passive aggressive in the process. It’s a song that had good intentions but it needed a drastic rewrite to make it work. Oh and this song won Video Of The Year at the MTV VMA’s, let that sink in. So no, I don’t want to calm down about this song being crap.
4.
Taki Taki by DJ Snake feat. Selena Gomez, Ozuna & Cardi B. If someone were to come up to me and say “What’s the most late 2010’s song ever made?”, I will point to this one. It’s a lineup of the most popular artists of the time, who do not work being together. A song about sex (how original), DJ Snake blesses us with a production of a mixture of house music and reggaeton called “moombahton”, but it really sounds watered down and pop friendly with an annoying beat drop that barely changes in key. The singers aren’t that better, Selena Gomez does her trademark raspy voice that clashes terribly with the beat combined with awful lyrics and forced attempts at sounding Spanish, Cardi B sounds like she’s trying with the material that she’s given and Ozuna here actually sounds passable unlike his other songs where he whines from the top of his lungs slathered with autotune. Overall, it’s a globby mess of EDM, pop, trap and reggaeton haphazardly fused together with no sense of direction. Thankfully, it’s going to be forgotten and a relic of its time that shouldn’t be replicated.
3.
Without Me by Halsey. Debatably the biggest female pop star right now, Halsey made a household name for herself making personal songs about love and teen angst mixed with midtempo trap production. Being sincere, it isn’t bad conceptually, it’s just not my cup of tea and I get why many people resonate with her and her songs. This song right here is supposedly her most personal, being about a breakup written after calling off her relationship with rapper G-Eazy. It’s too bad that the song is whiny and terrible. The first time I heard this song, I knew I wasn’t going to like it and on repeated listens, it didn’t get better. Production is interchangeable to her other songs, the lyrics are amateur level and incredibly shallow despite it being “personal”. If she really wanted to make it that way, couldn’t she at least mention G-Eazy by name or at least reference one of his songs to express her heartbreak? That actually would’ve made it tolerable but no, it has to be nondescript in order for it to be “relatable” for the listener. Lastly, the singing is godawful, blatantly being vocally processed and not natural, especially during the chorus where she wails. If she dialed it back or even used her natural voice, it also could’ve been tolerable but nope, she didn’t do that. Frankly, I don’t want to be too harsh since a lot of people find this song relatable, which is fine and all, but it definitely isn’t for me. Billboard ranks this as the 3rd biggest song of the year and it did go to number one which shows to you how devoted her fanbase it. Better luck next time Ashley and give us more songs like “Nightmare” next time.
2.
Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi. The first time I heard this song, I instantly hated it. It first went to number one in Capaldi’s native UK before crossing over to the States and making it to number one here and I don’t get why. The lyrics are about a breakup, but the writing is so confusing with a bunch of clunky lines that sound awkward to sing aloud. The production is a bland piano riff that sounds like a ripoff of “Someone Like You” by Adele. But what really cements it this high close to number one is the singing, dear fucking lord the singing is ear shattering. Lewis has this really whiny and nasal baritone where he enunciates the words and in the bridge, he wails in agony. It really sounds like he has a cold while taking a shit at the same time, it’s unpleasant to listen to. Earlier in the year we had a similar song, “Be Alright” by Dean Lewis with the same lyrics and accented singing, but that one is a lot better than this badly sung bore. Critics were merciless onto this song, and I don’t blame them at all and I hope that Capaldi also becomes a one hit wonder.
1.
Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored by Ariana Grande. This song just disappoints me on so many levels. I love Ariana Grande, she’s my favorite female pop singer of the 2010’s and her material from 2015-2016 will remain her best material to date. Unfortunately, she had a rough time in the latter half of the decade with the death of her boyfriend Mac Miller, her messy breakup with actor Pete Davidson and the bombing of her concert in Manchester where over 20 people died. As a result of this grief and trauma, it’s like she changed as a singer and it’s best reflected with her most recent album “thank u, next”. I would’ve chosen “7 Rings” for this list because of how greedy she acted and the bad message it gave out, but then I remembered that this song went to number two and made the Year End, and was the worst of the bunch. As the title implies, it’s about Ari telling a guy to break up with his girlfriend because she’s bored, that’s literally it, no other reason than just because. Not only is the message just awful to teach to her young audience, but it’s out of character for her and unlike her because she’s all about positivity and finding love. The fact that her singing is the same as her other songs implies that she’s into it, which makes the song a lot more questionable. This combined with the spacey and midtempo trap production makes the song depressing to listen to cause it sounds like she isn’t having fun recording it. It disappoints and sickens me because I love her music and she’s super talented and i’m sorry for all the shit she had to endure for the past year and a half, but she should know better than to create this garbage. At least 7 Rings can be interpreted as her coping with her trauma in a realistic albeit wrong way, this just has no reason to exist. With that I call this song the absolute worst hit song of 2019.
And that concludes my list. Did you agree or disagree with the list? Sometime soon i’m gonna start on my best list and talk about the songs that I loved from last year.
Can’t believe it took me like five hours to write all this and to listen to these songs on loop while writing the entries, God i’m exhausted.
