[Dark] Depression/Suicides within the fandom (The revival)

Background Pony #6DA2
ive found out today that i might have an illness that prevents me from getting truly happy. like im physically able to only feel relieved or okay at best. it doesnt have any difficult side effects and probably wont directly kill me, but it sure wont fucking stop me from doing it myself because i dont have a reason to keep trying anymore
Background Pony #6DA2
@Zincy  
idk i just know there is something wrong with the way my endocrine system makes hormones, because if im proven wrong i have absolutely no idea whats wrong with me
Background Pony #BFF0
Whoooo look at me I’m a toxic fuckboy who bases their self worth off of sex, wtfs wrong with this world?
Background Pony #1A79
I feel like a flamethrower soldier that found out why incendiary bullets are no fun.
Background Pony #6DA2
what the fuck did i do to deserve being so fucking depressed all the time just getting out of bed took so much energy today its unreal..
Beth
Silly Pony - Celebrated the 13th anniversary of MLP:FIM, and 40 years of MLP!
Shimmering Smile - Celebrated the 10th anniversary of Equestria Girls!
Solar Supporter - Fought against the New Lunar Republic rebellion on the side of the Solar Deity (April Fools 2023).
Elements of Harmony - Had an OC in the 2022 Community Collab
Tree of Harmony - Drew someone's OC for the 2022 Community Collab
Verified Pegasus - Show us your gorgeous wings!
Preenhub - We all know what you were up to this evening~
Philomena - For helping others attend the 2021 community collab
Twinkling Balloon - Took part in the 2021 community collab.
A Tale For The Ages - Celebrated MLP's 35th Anniversary and FiM's 8th Anniversary

In digital purgatory
I’m alive. My soul is just gone, and it’s so many things. I’m afraid i’ve acted ways where people are just unable to love me anymore.
Beth
Silly Pony - Celebrated the 13th anniversary of MLP:FIM, and 40 years of MLP!
Shimmering Smile - Celebrated the 10th anniversary of Equestria Girls!
Solar Supporter - Fought against the New Lunar Republic rebellion on the side of the Solar Deity (April Fools 2023).
Elements of Harmony - Had an OC in the 2022 Community Collab
Tree of Harmony - Drew someone's OC for the 2022 Community Collab
Verified Pegasus - Show us your gorgeous wings!
Preenhub - We all know what you were up to this evening~
Philomena - For helping others attend the 2021 community collab
Twinkling Balloon - Took part in the 2021 community collab.
A Tale For The Ages - Celebrated MLP's 35th Anniversary and FiM's 8th Anniversary

In digital purgatory
@altopony  
i’m suspended from discord for being vulgar and scary or something (and talking about dox mostly). i don’t want to bother people with it
 
I drew this violent fucked up art for money and bragged about it 2 years ago, and so many people have just stopped loving me, that i keep lashing out and making conflict, because I have nothing left. I can’t even draw anymore, and I tried, so the whole collab thing is a bust, multiple people i’m emotionally unable to be a friend to that now hate me.
 
I feel like i’m turning into a sociopath. I’m afraid to depend on the emotional trust of anyone anymore, I just stare into space and can’t look at people when talking to them.
Beth
Silly Pony - Celebrated the 13th anniversary of MLP:FIM, and 40 years of MLP!
Shimmering Smile - Celebrated the 10th anniversary of Equestria Girls!
Solar Supporter - Fought against the New Lunar Republic rebellion on the side of the Solar Deity (April Fools 2023).
Elements of Harmony - Had an OC in the 2022 Community Collab
Tree of Harmony - Drew someone's OC for the 2022 Community Collab
Verified Pegasus - Show us your gorgeous wings!
Preenhub - We all know what you were up to this evening~
Philomena - For helping others attend the 2021 community collab
Twinkling Balloon - Took part in the 2021 community collab.
A Tale For The Ages - Celebrated MLP's 35th Anniversary and FiM's 8th Anniversary

In digital purgatory
I did these two horrific vulgar sequences and then got 100$ for a 4 page comic, and ran away crying midway, with no way to pay them back.
 
at first i thought i was just going to wash away the memories with drugs, but the people i showed the art, their emotional trust in me was mortally scarred, and that’s when the trauma set in.
 
Since I’m dead inside and constantly need to justify my own reason for living, i’m going to be like a transsexual airforce pilot. Do some more of the vulgar unlovable stuff maybe, but do it to save the hearts of a group that does not deserve to be ostracized like I do.
 
I think Explosive ordinance disposal isn’t a good idea with my wiry nervres, death in the air is less frightening, because its less random.
Beth
Silly Pony - Celebrated the 13th anniversary of MLP:FIM, and 40 years of MLP!
Shimmering Smile - Celebrated the 10th anniversary of Equestria Girls!
Solar Supporter - Fought against the New Lunar Republic rebellion on the side of the Solar Deity (April Fools 2023).
Elements of Harmony - Had an OC in the 2022 Community Collab
Tree of Harmony - Drew someone's OC for the 2022 Community Collab
Verified Pegasus - Show us your gorgeous wings!
Preenhub - We all know what you were up to this evening~
Philomena - For helping others attend the 2021 community collab
Twinkling Balloon - Took part in the 2021 community collab.
A Tale For The Ages - Celebrated MLP's 35th Anniversary and FiM's 8th Anniversary

In digital purgatory
@TwilyIsBestPone  
yeah, I hate having near a heart attack from worrying about my heart.
 
I’m like 180/120 110bpm, mortal danger every day, when the large amounts of DXM and Alcohol go away randomly.
 
I could have a panic attack just looking at a taxidermy animal now, my heart is so weak
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