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Today I learned to NOT tie my genitals to the ceiling fan. It was funny at first, but then I couldn’t untie it and had to get a unicorn to magically undo the knot.
Edited because: Rule #7
Dear Diego,
Your threats are moot. I have all the Jesus parts assembled on the skull throne. Check and mate.
NEVER, EVER THREATEN MY CHANGELINGS AGAIN OR YOU WILL SUFFER CONSEQUENCES THE LIKES OF WHICH FEW THROUGHOUT HISTORY HAVE EVER SUFFERED BEFORE. WE ARE NO LONGER A HIVE THAT WILL STAND FOR YOUR DEMENTED WORDS OF VIOLENCE & DEATH. BE CAUTIOUS!
Multiple third-party individuals have reported one or more of your recent actions as being inappropriate. Once a citizen is notified in such a manner, said citizen is reviewed by members of the Adeptus Arbites in accordance to the Book of Judgement.
Upon review, we have determined that the following actions are in violation of the Book of Judgment:
Claiming to be moving the sun, posing as a God figure.
Your imperial right of existence has received its second judgement, which will expire upon your deathbed.
Additional violations may result in disabling of your legs, or the permanent termination of your life. Please note that killing yourself will not resolve the judgment on your existence, as you will be reassembled as a semi-sentient servitor until your tithe has been paid back to the Imperium.
If you wish to form an appeal to the Adpetus Arbites as to counter-act your judgement, please inform us as to why you believe the judgment to be wrongful in 20 words or less.
We appreciate your understand.
Yours truly Diego Brando